I’m wanting more than ever to try to honor Him with my school work.
This has been ridiculous. It seriously is a flesh vs. spirit battle here. I’m getting by fine, not failing classes or anything, but I wanna do things with excellence and not just slide by barely making it. But in the mean time, I’ve let it pile up. So tonight its homework, homework, homework, ihop prayer room to jam to, and a deactivated facebook till the semester’s over. Victory is mineeee, haha :)
Its funny how we ask God to do something, and then later we’re like, “Oh yeah… I did ask you to do that.” I’ve found that the cry of my heart lately has been for Him to refine me, reveal to me things in my life that are not of Him, remove my idols.
I don’t want any other lovers.
And thus, this has been happening.
There is a song I’ve heard on 91.5 countless times [http://youtu.be/p6MvZLDBFpU] … I could even sing it to you. It’s a powerful, needed song in the body of Christ today… but the lyrics never peirced my heart till a couple days ago during this journey I’m on. This line in particular:
Anything I can’t stop thinking of is an idol.
The biggest idol He’s reveal to me that I’ve had is marriage… or at least the idea of it, seeing as how I am not married. I’ve been so hung up on the idea for so long. And had you asked me even a week ago if it was an idol in my life, I would have, without hesitation, said no. But, by my savior’s grace, He’s refining me :) I’m trusting Him on a new level today, thankful for His beautiful, merciful way of answering my request and moving me forward.
To my future husband,
I have a new appreciation and excitement for what God has in store for us. Praying for you :)
“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.”
“Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”
When I created the heavens and the earth, I spoke them into being. When I created man, I formed him and breathed life into his nostrils. But you, woman, I fashioned after I breathed the breath of life into man because your nostrils are too delicate. I allowed a deep sleep to come over him so I could patiently and perfectly fashion you.
Man was put to sleep so that he could not interfere with the creativity. From one bone I fashioned you. I chose the bone that protects man’s life. I chose the rib, which protects his heart and lungs and supports him, as you are meant to do.
Around this one bone I shaped you. I modeled you. I created you perfectly and beautifully. Your characteristics are as the rib, strong yet delicate and fragile. You provide protection for the most delicate organ in man, his heart. His heart is the center of his being; his lungs hold the breath of life. The rib cage will allow itself to be broken before it will allow damage to the heart.
Support man as the rib cage supports the body. You were not taken from his feet, to be under him, nor were you taken from his head, to be above him. You were taken from his side, to stand beside him and be held close to his side. You are my perfect angel. You are my beautiful little girl. You have grown to be a splendid woman of excellence, and my eyes fill when I see the virtue in your heart. Your eyes — don’t change them. Your lips — how lovely when they part in prayer. Your nose so perfect in form, your hands so gentle to touch.
I’ve caressed your face in your deepest sleep; I’ve hold your heart close to mine.